You're Stupid

© 2008 Dave Clegg

Imparting my wisdom on current affairs

At the Cul-de-sac Spring Barbeque,

My know-it-all neighbor suggested my facts

Were in need of some further review.

I squinted my eyes as I rubbed on my chin,

To contemplate my point of view.

Well, I checked it over and, lo and behold,

It confirmed what I already knew.

And if you disagree, you're stupid.

Your knuckles drag and you drool.

There's rocks in your head,

You still wet the bed,

You're mama's ugly and she raised a fool.

I've built my fortress with iron-clad proof.

There's no sense in challenging me.

And you're taking shots at my bullet-proof walls

With your pea-shooter philoso-phy.

Your dislike of reasoning has me perplexed.

You're either obtuse or naive.

How can you stand there and hear what I say,

And not change the way you believe?

And if you disagree, you're stupid.

Your knuckles drag and you drool.

There's rocks in your head,

You still wet the bed,

You're mama's ugly and she raised a fool.

Now, I've done my homework and I've been around.

And I know what's noble and true.

Just 'cause you talk like some Magna Cum Loudmouth,

Why should I listen to you?

If you think I'll switch horses smack-dab in the stream,

Well, partner, don't hold your breath.

'Cause I love this pony and I'll make him swim,

If I have to beat him to death.

And if you disagree, you're stupid.

Your knuckles drag and you drool.

There's rocks in your head,

You still wet the bed,

You're mama's ugly and she raised a fool.