Daily Scribble

I once called Congress “organized crime”

But then I realized,

I was wrong to think that way.

They’re not that organized. 

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

Father Time plays favorites.

There’s no denying that.

Some, he beats with a pillow,

And some with a baseball bat.

©2011

Scribbles

He really loves despising hate

And makes a big deal of it.

And those with whom he disagrees?

He hates ‘em. Don’t you love it? 

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

Which qualities does she possess?

Which ones does she lack?

He wonders as he walks the aisle

With a shotgun in his back.

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

Your promise is my steeple

When I’m lost and life is scary.

Your world is my cathedral,

Your love, my sanctuary. 

©2011Cleggo

Daily Scribble

Kids believe that cooties

Are a plague to be rejected.

By their teens, they use all means

To get themselves infected.

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

The dryer is a portal

To a distant, unknown place.

Where socks become abducted 

By some strange, one-legged race.

©2011

Daily Scribble

He’s never been asked a question

That he hasn’t answered yet,  

The one he answers mostly is,

“How dumb can one man get?”

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

He deftly trains his one good eye

On everyone’s guffaws.

The one that’s blind, he’ll use to find

His own mistakes and flaws.

©2011 Cleggo

Decked Out

I once built a deck

To enjoy the outdoors. 

I added a roof 

For the times when it pours. 

I put up some screening

To keep out the bugs.

I added a sofa,

A chair, and some rugs.

Extremes in temperature

Really got old,

So, windows and walls

For the heat and the cold. 

I sat in that room

And thought, “Wait a sec!”

“I really miss sitting

Outside on the deck.”

So I built a new one, 

As nice as before,

Then added a roof 

To keep rain off the floor.

Then, up went more walls

And soon, “What the heck?”

Another nice room,

But I still want a deck!”

So, I built yet another,

Then closed it all in.

And repeated this process

Again and again. 

So, now when I travel

I’m able to roam,

From here to Alaska

Without leaving home.

©2011 Cleggo

Scribbles

No, I’m not fishing for complements.

Such conduct I truly disdain. 

But if, as I float, one should jump in the boat,

Well, who am I to complain?

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

There are just two situations

Where I use the “Eastwood Squint”.

Communicating anger,

Or when reading tiny print. 

©2011 Cleggo

Scribbles

It’s often from a certain need

That new words are created.

As for me, I need to be

Undiscombobulated.

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

With bitter winds assaulting,

In the icy rain, I stoop. 

One question haunts my tortured soul;

“When WILL this dumb dog poop?”

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

A fire warms

The icy glaze,

In the land of the freeze

And the home of the blaze.

©2011 Cleggo

Scribbles

As I held her tightly in my arms,

With the light of the full moon gleaming.

I kissed her fair face. What a lovely embrace!

(Except for the kicking and screaming.)

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

May you know from the moment 

You rise from the sack,

When you hit the ground running

It won’t hit you back.

©2010 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

The fortune teller took my hand,

Unfurled my palm and read it.

“This line says you will waste your money.

Now, will this be cash or credit?”

©2011 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

Not everyone will like you,

Nor will you like everyone. 

But live so that you’ll like yourself

When all is said and done.

©2010 Cleggo

Daily Scribble

“I won’t blab your secret.” 

That’s exactly what I swore. 

But hey, you blabbed to me,

It’s not a secret anymore.

©2011 Cleggo

A Toast to the New Year

©2011 Cleggo

May the New Year bring much laughter,

And joy around your table.

May weevils not infest your flour,

Nor lint infest your navel.

May heretofore unruly kids

Behave beyond their ages. 

And may you never feel the need  

To lock them up in cages.

May the sound of screaming toddlers

Be forever hushed and gone.

And may the neighbor’s basset hounds

Not desecrate your lawn. 

May all your bags be waiting

On the airport carousel. 

And may you never learn what’s in

The meat at Taco Bell. 

May all your socks be reunited

With their matching twin. 

And may you add another year

And not another chin. 

May you always pick the fastest line 

When at the supermarket 

And never leave your car

And not remember where you park it.

May your college sports team

Be the best in all the nation 

And get away scot-free

With every ethics violation.  

May you enjoy bizarre behavior

When there’s no one else around 

May you breath air through your nose 

Without that awful whistling sound. 

May you not discover 

That your father is Darth Vader. 

May intestinal disturbance 

Never foul your elevator.

May you only choose the shopping carts

Without the wobbly wheels. 

And may your wife not catch you

In her lipstick and high heels.

May even your most awful jokes

Leave everyone in stitches.

And may you feast and never find

You’re too big for your britches.

May all your wealthy friends remain

Forever in your debt. 

And may this year be better 

Than the best of all years yet.

Cheers.